Tom 7 is brilliant.

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Posterior Mercantilism

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Leela!

The winsome lass’s a beauty.

Leela

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Gooooaaaaallll!

I played me first ice hockey game last night. It were bein' insanely fun. The team tied at 4-4 after no goals in th' overtime period.

I finished th' night with two goals and an assist, and a bottle of rum! Here’s a video o' me scorin' me second goal.

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Surgery

When I were bein' 18 I destroyed me ankle playin' basketball at Whitehall Camp. It’s ne'er been th' same since that day. Shiver me timbers! This past Monday I finally got it fixed. The sharks will eat well tonight! Since th' ligaments were all stretched out and detached, me podiatrist (Dr. Stanley Bosta) used a tendon in me heel fer th' repair, to be sure. The ornery cuss passed it through a hole in me ankle bone and looped it back on itself t' tighten up th' ridiculously loose ankle o' mine.

Here are some disgustin' pictures o' th' aftermath. Prepare to be boarded! These pictures are four days post-surgery.

Ankle surgery
Ankle surgery
Ankle surgery
Ankle surgery

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